the resource project

Preventing Future Abuse

When sexual abuse has occurred within a family, parents often worry about how to keep all of their children safe moving forward. While this can feel overwhelming, there are practical steps you can take to reduce risk and help your children feel safe.

Prioritize Safety. The safety of your child and any siblings comes first.

• Follow any safety recommendations made by the Children’s Aid Society (CAS), police, or the court.

• Ensure there is no unsupervised contact between children and the person who caused harm unless authorized by the appropriate authorities.

• Let your children know that adults are responsible for keeping them safe.

Teach Healthy Boundaries. Help children understand:

• Everyone has the right to say "no" to unwanted touch.

• Their body belongs to them.

• Safe adults listen when children express discomfort.

• Secrets about touching or private body parts should never have to be kept.

These conversations should be ongoing and age-appropriate rather than a one-time discussion.

Encourage Open Communication

Create an environment where children know they can talk to you about anything.

Try to:

• Listen calmly without judgment.

• Believe your child if they share concerns.

• Check in regularly about how they are feeling.

• Reassure them they will not get into trouble for telling you something.

Children who feel heard are more likely to report situations that make them uncomfortable.

Supervise Family Interactions

If the person who caused harm is part of the extended family:

• Carefully consider attendance at family gatherings.

• Follow any existing safety plans.

• Inform trusted caregivers of any safety concerns when appropriate.

• Never expect children to manage their own safety around someone who has harmed them.

Support Siblings

Siblings may also experience fear, confusion, anger, or sadness, even if they were not directly harmed. Provide opportunities for siblings to:

• Ask questions in an age-appropriate way.

• Express their feelings.

• Receive reassurance that the adults are taking steps to keep everyone safe.

Consider Ongoing Professional Support

When a child needs additional support, trauma-informed counselling can help them:

• Build healthy boundaries.

• Develop body safety skills.

• Strengthen confidence in speaking up.

• Process feelings about family changes.

Helping Children Rebuild Safe Trust

After sexual abuse, many children become confused about who is safe to trust. Some become fearful of all adults, while others continue to trust people too quickly. Both responses can be understandable after trauma.

You can help your child rebuild healthy trust by:

• helping them learn to recognize respectful and unsafe behaviours in adults and other young people

• respecting their boundaries when they say "no" to hugs, kisses, or physical affection

• encouraging them to identify several trusted adults they can talk to if they ever feel unsafe

• practicing body safety and consent in everyday situations

• helping them understand that safe adults listen, respect boundaries, and never ask children to keep secrets about touching or private body parts

• reminding them that they can always come to you—even if someone tells them not to

Over time, supportive relationships, clear boundaries and consistent adult protection can help children rebuild confidence and a greater sense of safety.

Parents may also benefit from support in maintaining safety plans and responding to their children's needs. Remember: One caring, protective adult can make a significant difference in a child's recovery. By believing your child, maintaining clear safety boundaries, encouraging open communication, and working with professionals, you are helping create a safe environment where healing can continue.

Note: If you have immediate concerns that any child may be at risk of sexual abuse or harm, contact your local CAS. If a child is in immediate danger, call 911.

for additional reading and listening:

•  Commit to Kids: Guide for Parents — Canadian Centre for Child Protection
  A Canadian guide designed specifically for parents, with practical information about understanding child sexual abuse, reducing risk, recognizing appropriate and inappropriate adult-child boundaries, and choosing safer organizations and activities for children.
  Read the Commit to Kids Guide for Parents

• Safeguarding Your Child — Canadian Centre for Child Protection
  A practical Canadian resource for parents and caregivers focused on strengthening children's personal safety and helping adults create safer environments around them. It fits particularly well with your sections on boundaries, communication and adult responsibility for children's safety.
  Explore parent safety resources

• Commit to Kids: Foundational Information for Safeguarding Children from Sexual Abuse — Canadian Centre for Child Protection
  A free 23-minute learning resource covering grooming, boundary transgressions, barriers to disclosure and ways adults can help safeguard children. Although designed primarily for people who work with children, the Centre specifically notes that parents may also find it relevant.
  Watch the free training

• How Can Parents Help Protect Kids from Sexual Abuse & CSAM? — RAINN
  A concise parent-focused resource about ongoing conversations, body boundaries, consent, online boundaries and making it easier for children to tell a trusted adult when something feels wrong. Note: RAINN is U.S.-based; Canadian resources in The Resource Project should take precedence for reporting and legal information.
  Read the parent guide